How do you reflect back on your life? After all your still here, you’re still young and you’re moving at the speed of light. At least I am. My sister called me last night the first time in a while, we aren’t able to talk much due to the fact she is busy and I am busy, the world turns and we all run round and round so not to fall off the edge.
She had news, my sister about an old high school friend who I had not see, talked to or regrettably had not thought of in many years. Our conversation started with “Hi sis, how are you doing?” “Fine” I answer “What‘s up” wanting to get right to the point of her calling
“I have sad news, Tina died about two hours ago” she said. “What, really I didn’t even know she was sick. (Cancer) We talked for a few more minutes and promised to keep closer in touch.
After we hang up I gave it all of fifteen minutes to think how truly sad it was that my friend was gone and at an early age 47, then it was back to my nightly chores and taking care of my own family, forgetting that she was my family first. We spent our middle and high schools years together and grew into young adults, before I would marry many years later and be blessed to have two girls to drive me crazy and fill up my arms at night.
Tina and I ran together, partied together, got in trouble together and grew up together. We spent years getting to know each other and becoming the people are now, only to have a falling out over WHAT I cannot tell you now.
Time passes and paths separate, tomorrows come and go without a word of forgiveness uttered. I guess what all this rambling is adding up to is this, (Forgive.)
Pain is unavoidable we all feel it and we all hand it out, but it’s how we handle the pain that intersects with in our lives. Holding a grudge, or waiting for the other person to admit defeat can leave you hollow. There’s an ach in your heart that sits and wait for relief, you tell yourself if that’s the way the other person want to act, then I guess it’s over. Holding your prisoner by not forgiving can eat you alive.
I do not have a chance now to make up with my lost friend, she is gone and I sit here with regret wondering why in this world of internets, cell phones, Facebook and more I could find a way to say Hey, how are you.